Salam.
Its one o'clock in the morning & I'm having a chess match still with wan hafiz. My mind is so-so focussed on the match. It seems like i'm losing again. Hhmmph!
with vietnamese guy..dun remember his name..huhu
I feel like writing something. So i'm thinking of logging in to my blog. But i dont feel like it also. *pemalas* How bout fb?? *Hehe*smiling..
Oops!! wan had juz checked my king. Better go see how he did that. Hmm. Feel like losing again. And feeling sleepy.. Had been yawning since 11. But struggling with myself not to sleep *have to wait for my isyak prayer first*
Hey..i'm a stalker. What am i suppose to do. I got a habit of looking at thid one particular person's page on fb. I dont want this. I want to be normal. I want to be the old me but how?! I feel awful everytime i did so. I may appear normal. But i know i reacted abnormally. This is all because of my stupid feeling.. *I'm still guilty, I guess*
But i dont want to say its stupid. I'm still in my right mind when i feel this. I'm still sane. I know im normal for having such feelings.. *No!, it's not normal at all.* But for having it alone without that particular person knowing dat he is driving me crazy. I guess he has forgiven me. But, everytime i see him there's an adrenalin rush & those guilty feelings is still there.
It is so...so.. hmmmmmmmm..like im writing a script. How i wish i could just make a speech. A prayer to Him. That all this would fade. So that i could jus b me.. A happy me. So please just let it fade. Please...
Let it come back later. When i'm fully armored. I mean matured. *huhu*
Praise the God. Only He could create such a complex situation. n only He could give the solution. Ameen... Help me..
"And seek assistance through patience and prayer, and most surely it is a hard thing except for the humble ones" -2:45
